Ding Ding Ding!

Round 780 or something like that.

I am trying to lose weight.

I hoping for better luck this time and hoping it sticks. I feel very nervous/skeptical about this being a lasting late starting resolution. But there is never a better time than NOW to start. I just hope I can stay motivated!!! So if you are reading this and have any advice, tips, encouragements. I'll take them!!! I am going to try to keep this as a tracker. Any avenue I can use I am trying. I hope I am not overdoing it and setting myself up for failure. I really need to change, and the world around me is a tasty place.
That big eyesore in my livingroom is WONDERFUL. I love it and today, in addition to working out on it for 32 minutes, I also did "girlie" push ups until my arms said no more. Next time I am going to count the number I do and see how far I can get as my time goes on. Lost 2 pounds since I started exercising on it. Also, I have been drinking TONS of water.
I did take a before picture. If I do make attainable goals, and successfully acheive some of them, I might be brave and try to post before and after pictures.

BUT

I've said that before and never have. I really should make that as one of my resolutions too. I will check into that too.

Thanks Aunt Patty for reminding me of my little blog, and my handful of sweet lovely readers!

The Christmas Letter-like Post.

Well life is speeding along and and I'm just trying to enjoy the ride. A quick update on my family members.


Me: Still loving my job. Have a great "family" I work with. So happy I changed hospitals! God has blessed me numerous times over with this change, and I am forever grateful.
I am starting a New Year's Resolution. Like most I am going to try to lose some weight. I really want to do good at this. I hope I am not setting myself up for failure. I am joining 2 weight loss "programs." The pound plunge, and Healthy Lifestyles Nebraska. Both which do weekly weigh ins, and awards prizes for losses. We also have purchased a elliptical workout machine, which, once it arrives will be a giant eye sore and uncomfortable piece of furniture in out living room. So if you are coming over for a visit, I apologize now, I promise not to make you sit on it though! ;) Currently I have a little cold/throat bug bothering me but that will soon subside with the nice meds I was given to day!


Ryan: He is still working a Weathercraft. He got a new company truck. Its white, so now all the vehicles in front of our home are white. Ryan's, been working on the siding and upstairs bedroom in his free time, which is a rarity with our little ones running around. Cancer stuff is still int eh clear. Hopefully in the next 18 months he will be completely done with it all! PTL!

Luke: My little school boy. He learns new fun things all the time, and (I'm a little biased) he remembers things SO well. He can still tell me what each of his and Adalei's birthdays were (minus his first), what he/she got, what he/she ate for their birthday and who was there. I will say that there are pictures there that might have triggered these memories, but none browsed through in a LONG time. I hope he keeps that capacity to remember things! Its all about letters and number for him right now. Some were a struggle, and in the process of working with Luke Adalei has picked up on a lot of it and actually can count better than her big brother.
Adalei: Speaking of Adalei, my little sweetie is getting so big, she and Luke wear the same size!!! She is just 2 inches shorter than Luke too. My little talker. Right now her brain is moving faster than her mouth can catch up and she has started to stutter a little, but what from what I have researched, she should grow out of it before she is 4, and not to worry about it until then. Adalei's biggest accomplishment is the potty! She is almost completely day potty trained for Mommy (won't go at all for Daddy), and stays dry 1/2 teh time during naps. She wants to be a big girl and "do it self." Adalei has her yearly heart check up right around the corner. I don't foresee any complications arising either. Adalei is a growing weed and her heart seems to beat strong with her!

I hope all my friends and family had a lovely holiday and I will try to share more frequently.

Love,
Cindy

Hearts desires

I had an amazing Mothers Day. I worked on Sunday, it was a quiet day. One of my co-workers gave 2 roses to each of us working. So, sweet of her. After I got home I was welcomed with hugs and kisses galore, and my fabulous husband made me supper: goobers (cut up and fried breaded stew meat), fried potatoes, creamed corn, and cottage cheese. Yummo!And for dessert he made me brownie pudding! Yum. I couldn't of tasted any better that is unless my Momma had made it! :) I also got two homemade card and two colored pictures from the kids, and chocolates and a Glee CD and the blue-ray of Notebook! We watched the notebook and i cried and then I read and played with my babies and then it was bedtime. Great day!

Friday night I talked to Ryan about my unsure calling. The end result was what I thought it was going to be. Keep praying, our family probably can't logical do that right now, but if God want us to continue with that that he will figure a way for us to be able to do it. I will also mention that prior to telling him I prayed again as to if this is what He wanted. After I talked to Ryan what I may have thought was Him telling me that our next baby would have DS, Ryan said that I maybe am just letting my subconscious fears rule over. I really don't know what is Him and what is me. So anyways, I am still seeking. However, I did tell Ryan to open his mind to a calling. He hesitantly said he would.

So thus, hearts desires or God's desires? That is the question.

Life Cyclical

I feel like this time in my life is repetitious. I am aware that I have added another child into the mix, but I feel like things are in a way deja vu to me right now.
I am creatively in tune, and trying to find outsources for it.
I feel the absolute need to lose weight and exercise, and by ends day haven't accomplished much into that.
I feel more need to share more thus blog more. Which is good for this page, because to be honest, about 2 months ago I was very tempted to just delete my blog. I was certain my lack of post had resulted in no readers anymore. I am glad to see I still have one reader. :)


Another cyclic event is the potty training of my Adalei. No go yet. She has been going pee-pee following our q 15 minute potty breaks. I am going to keep trying, but if she doesn't get it over this weekend I might give her some more time to figure out things before pressuring her. She know when she does go, she says "potty, yucky." just getting her there before an accident happens hasn't happened. Yet! Sigh.

The need for organization and cleanliness is pressuring me. I really want some motivation and ideas on how to organize things.

Lastly but not least, is my feelings of the need to show kindness and love to others, yet not smothering them. I think I miss having time with friends outside of work that I seen to bother those that I work with a little bit. I have a overwhelming need to be liked, that I am very paranoid at times that everyone hates me, and am way to sensitive, however, in trying to not be so sensitive I become unkind. Ugh. I need a happy medium!

Phew. That felt good! Cleaned and organized my brain a little at least. Alright nap time for my babies are in order, now I will work on cleaning and other fun things I need to tackle!!

Adalei's Journey Part 1

Happy Mommy!

It is taking forever for the photos to upload and be positioned correctly so I am going to play the story out a little bit.

Monday August 10th 2009.

I had made a post this day. Wishing that "today would be the day." I had previously guessed it to be the day I would deliver Adalei. Throughout the day I had irregular contractions. Nothing majorly painful or consistent. I Bounced away on my birthing ball not really knowing what would happen. I talked to my mom and my mother -in-law informing them of the contractions, but not to expect anything. I definitely had a surge of energy that day. Looking back it was nesting. I talked to Ryan and my mothers throughout the day, still feeling about the same nothing to get excited about (Shucks!). All day I was consistently trying to get the lawn mower to run and get the lawn mowed. I was always unlucky and it never stayed running. My 4th and final attempt was about 430. I went inside and messed around on the computer and then straightened more things up around the house. I called Ryan to inform him of the mowers issues and he planned on fixing it after work. Throughout this time I was having stronger contractions while I was walking and such, but nothing that took my breath away. It slowed me down but never stopped me. Ryan got home around 600 and Luke woke up from his nap around then. Ryan changed clothes, visited to me a little about different plans for the night and off he went to to try to restart the mower. Around 630 I was changing Luke's diaper, and was reaching to grab him from "escaping" Mommy while I was putting his pants back on him and I felt a weird pop inside. It kind of sounded like a joint popping but not really and then a gush. "Oh my..."
"hurry Luke get your pants on." I was sitting on the living floor which is carpet. I fought with the pants to get them on the right way, and ran to the bathroom, more gushing with each movement.

Ryan came inside to get something, and I hollered from the bathroom "Ryan..."
He didn't hear. So I decided to get up and tell him and then get ready to go the the hospital. He was about to walk out the door and I told him. " You aren't going to be mowing the lawn..... we are going to be having the baby. My water just broke."

"oh, okay." he replies and then says, "well what do we need to be doing?" It was like boom he was making plans and getting things ready instantly. His folks were on their way back from Kearney and after the call was made they were planning on stopping in to get Luke. I Showered and got ready. Really not having any contractions in the shower, I was feeling so excited and happy. Once I got dressed, then wham they started. Strong and heavy. I called my mom and told her we were on our way to the hospital. She told me I should have just came to North Platte this morning, when I started the contractions. (Had I'd known I might have.) It was around 700 pm when we left the house, I started timing them and they were coming every 3 minutes on the dot. Ryan drove 10-15 mph over the speed limit and with the hazards on. I think he was glad to have an excuse to speed! :) I tried to call the doctor to let him know we were on our way. We were happy to hear that is was Dr. J again that was on call (he delivered Luke). They paged him to call me but we arrived at the hospital without ever hearing from him.

740 pm We sat in the ER for about 10-15 minutes waiting for the busy OB floor staff to come get me. All the while the ER secretary getting more fidgety and nervous, with each contraction, which were coming about every 2 minutes and more painful. I am still releasing the amniotic fluid, the whole time apologizing profusely for the wet chair I was leaving behind.

We got to the floor.

I got out of my clothes and into the gown. Hooked up to the monitor and checked. 5cm dilated. 100% effaced and still high -1. My mother and sister arrive on the scene and help through the journey.

Iv started and labs drawn. The OB floor is super busy and I am thankful to have a wonderful nurse getting me all situated while they were awaiting more help. The nurse informs me that she would go ahead and have the anesthesiologist come and see me after he was done with the patient he is currently with. I tell my nurse thanks and that I plan on holding off as much as I can. The labor pains were tolerable. As the nurse is finishing everything up and getting all necessary questions asked and items ready the CRNA shows up and by now (which was probably an hour but I am not definite.) I was ready to see him. The pains were getting bad and I requests everyone to not talk during contractions. The CRNA asked his slew of questions and I managed to not rip his head off while he talked and joked during my contractions. My mother kindly asked him to be quiet after I gave her one of those looks-- "will you kill this guy for me" looks. He laughed and continued on his merry way.

Then I was sitting up high on the side bed, being told to lean over my belly, and feeling like I was going to fall off the bed. My mother and sister supported more for comfort than actually holding me up, and the epidural was placed during a break from the contractions. I hate this time right here, it's awful feeling!

I had my epidural in place and had some weird back pain at first but it stopped soon after and then I was allowed to lay back down.

As soon as I laid down I had this incredible urge to go the bathroom. The nurse was shocked and I was not feeling any relief from the epidural. The nurse checked me I was complete and Adalei was coming down. She got more help in the room and got the Dr paged. I was having a lot of pain so the CRNA gave me more medicine and said that had he known I was going to go this fast he would have just done a spinal. The medicine was starting to work a little, I could feel everything, but it was muted. I was starting to feel urges to push. I was fighting off the urge by "blowing across the room" as instructed by the nurse. I am not sure how much time passed, but it felt like the Dr. J couldn't get there fast enough, they helped me to stay calm and assured me they would be there if Dr. J. didn't get there in time. The second he did get there I was finally allowed to push and this time it took more pushing, more and more. I thought to myself I can't feel where I'm pushing. So I spoke up and we adjusted the bed and me and then I felt much more in control of my pushing. So after (maybe 15 minutes of pushing) I could see her little head. Look at all that hair! We were surprised! 5 minutes later I had Adalei Rose on my tummy. Ryan got to cut the cord and my mother and sister were both there to share the joy.

I helped dry her off, and noticed her color wasn't to great, they decided to move her to the isolette for the cleaning and checks. Her apgar was 6/9. She was a big girl 9 pounds 1.7 ounces. 22 inches long. I can't believe how big she was either, but it also explained some of why it took a little longer to deliver her.

Over all I was super impressed at the way my labor and delivery went. Most of it at home, and fast at the hospital. I am happy with my pain tolerance too. The first go around I wasn't able to get past 4 cm w/o the epidural. I imagine I was 7 or better during this one.

Things were great that night as we welcomed our little bundle to the world. We loved introducing her to her family. More of those pictures later! Stay tuned!

Lazy Days

I had yesterday and today off. It is so nice. This weekend was crazy. I am hoping Wed. and Thu. are nicer days.
Yesterday we planted some berry plants: service berry, gooseberry, raspberry, blueberry and grapes. I don't think most of them will bear any fruit this year, but I think that would be so neat if they did a little. I mowed the lawn and just bummed around the house mostly yesterday. It is 1000 am and Luke is still sleeping. I am shocked! Of course my other child decided to wake Mommy up at 730. Drat. I would have loved to sleep in. Oh well got some laundry started and and a few things tidied up before Luke gets up.

I thought I would post a few things about the baby and such.

How far along? 27 weeks and 6 days

Mommy's weight? Man I wish it were less. I think as punishment for kinda gloating about my low progress (in that area) so far, I got kicked in the gut and food forced down my mouth.... I gained another 7 pounds in 2 weeks. 17 pounds total. Eeck! So I am going to blame 1 pound on the baby, and the other 6 pounds I am going to keep them tucked back and try not to exceed 25 lbs now. I have been choosing fruits of empty sweets. However the brownies that I ate, they don't count right? Cutting back of indulging on the cravings, and making healthier choices. I have stayed the same weight the last 3 days, so that's alright. I am not going to restrict my baby from growing. Don't worry. Knowing me, I will probably gain 40 pounds this pregnancy... Sigh.

Baby is how big? 14 1/2 inches long and about 2 pounds, according to parents connect.

Cravings? Fruit. Its better anyway, and Fruit flavored teas. Yummy.

Labor signs? Remember I said work was crazy, well I did not sit down for about 6 hours on Saturday and was starting to get a contraction about every 5-7 minutes. The last of them were fairly hard ones, and I decided no more, I am taking a break I don't care who has to go pee, or needs another cup of coffee. They stopped almost immediately, once I ate lunch and drank a bunch of water, I felt much better.

Maternity clothes? Pants are awful, All of them are tight after about an hour. Tops I got a few more color variations of the striped shirts I am really liking right now.Hopefully I will find a few new pants/shorts when I am in Omaha.

Sleep? Still the same, sore on my hips, shoulders, and ears from sleeping on my sides. Tossing and turning and not sleeping. Preparation for sleepless nights with my baby.

Milestone? Another appointment next week sometime. The last of the monthly and on to the twice a month visits. That seems so strange to me. Possibly another US also. I am very much okay with not finding out now though. I was just hoping for a few baby pics for the baby book.

I have kind of relaxed about the whole breastfeeding thing. I was getting so paranoid, and I realize that all that stress was not going to help. So I am just going to wait it out.

I am getting super excited about Ryan and my trip to Omaha!!

Stay cool in the Heat today!!!

Save it for another day.

Baby was in the wrong position. We were unable to see anything, and once again no pictures. I am bummed that he didn't take any for us. But, I suppose I should just be happy he agreed to do another ultrasound. He also told me that we might sneak in at my next appointment for another peek. Good. I wonder if I ask him about it if he would take a 4-D pic like he told me at my 20 week appt???
I mentioned the contractions, and of course, he said the tried and true response, "rest and drink lots of fluids, if it doesn't go away in 1 hour than call." I already knew that. He was nice and explained other possible pre-term labor symptoms and assured me me that if necessary, he would write a Dr. note for me to rest more at work when/if needed. I am happy to here that. So I suppose I have a new favorite OB Dr. However, Dr. J will remain awesome in my book. I just have to squeeze in the other 3 doctors now, because I am supposed to see all in the group in case one of them delivers me, they would have all interacted with the care of my pregnancy. However, with Dr. T "bribing" me with all these ultrasounds, I keep on setting up apportionment's with him. I can honestly say though, I am almost at peace with not knowing. It makes me even more excited for the delivery... many many weeks from now! At least we are at the milestone date, Woo Hoo!

Luke is growing good. Tall for his age, and growing just right. Made the doctor (and all of us)laugh, so that was fun to see. Dr said that she would babysit him anytime if we needed one! Hee hee. My big boy also got 3 shots today. Tolerating them well also.


Ryan will need surgery. He has 2 torn ligaments in his ankle, and a badly bruised bone. The PA there said that Ryan can wait to have surgery. So he is on physical therapy and has a brace in the meantime. Ryan will plan to have surgery when work slows down. In November (after deer season of course).

Loved my new eye doc. Very nice and thorough. New contacts in 2 weeks! Speaking of which, my eyes are very tired and I think I will take out my contacts and get some sleep!

Night all.

Opening Ceremonies

Welcome, I decided that I needed another outlet for my blogging, I had been blogging on my myspace account and honestly I hadn't gotten any or very few comments or responses from readers, so I decided to give it a whirl here. I wont swamp you all to my whole life story in one post, but if interested I will be happy to share.

I have a beautiful little boy named Luke. He is my highlight of each day. He is 14 months old. Running around and getting into everything.

Ryan, is my wonderful husband. He is currently half way through Chemo treatments for cancer. Quite a struggle some days, but we are blessed that we found it quickly and we are hopefully almost dome with his treatments. 3 1/2 weeks to go. Whoorah!

Our house is a Constructions zone. This is often a source of my frustrations on a weekly basis, as we have only half of our house livable right now, and live off of microwavable food. Blah.

Well, as I continue to find opportunities to share, I will.

God Bless you!

Cindy